Thanks for the emails, reiki, thoughts and calls. I think that it helps to know that others care and understand...it eases the pain and makes it easier to "come back" after the storm. Thanks for that. Somehow I'm feeling better as the week comes to an end.
We lost Willie late on Monday night and it was both sad and traumatic. It was a very, very bad experience, actually - and that is all I really want to say about that right now. Distance helps give us perspective and for that I am grateful.
I find that there is so much guilt involved with pet loss - "are we doing the best for...", " could I have been a better advocate...?", "why didn't I ask about...?", "maybe I should have insisted...?", "I wish I would have..." and so on. I wonder if it is similar with human illness and death? We become a voice for our pets and also have that "choice" to end their suffering with euthanasia - a call we really don't have to make with our loved-people. So many opportunities for guilt and second guessing. Its hard.
So we're working it out. It will take time.
I'm hoping for a garden post this weekend as there is a lot of vibrance out there - a good feeling of new life.